A Sonnet of Death by Psychosis: Part 1

I look back inside my psychotic death;
mind, none fathomed my plane exists, being
in the moment. All seemed natural, loving.
Left my body in these moments’ deep breaths:

A fully conscious veil of living death,
touched and healed by the Light’s power teeming.
I fly through the ward, without much speaking.
Peers react to thoughts/intentions, confess:

Faces, actions all spiritually declothed:
their thoughts, emotions, intentions, I see.
She briefly comes to mind while I fly high.

In my asylum room, we’re befuddled,
We see our empty vessels, flesh and be,
Our flesh journals on her, our being thrives.

-theothersid3

photo credit: marfis75 Im Schacht. via photopin (license)

Seed of 1


How God became one and the rest of the universe became one is the seed we all carry that sprouts after death. Wherever we look we see glimpses and clues of it: never the full picture, whether microscope or telescope.

We are capable of understanding, but no one is capable of explaining how we each became 1 from the formless, infinite amnesia of the world’s past.

When time lapses, we will have a living explanation of… Everything. We will have eaten the choice forbidden knowledge, paid the consequences, and love its wisdom.

That is wholeness, or what we call “heaven,” or “paradise.” It is the fruits of God’s labor. Our labor.


photo credit: amandabhslater First Seedling via photopin (license)

Bawling My Soul Out

I have three things going on in my life that are all stressing me out to the max: I’m losing my job tomorrow, my mom, and something personal.

I’m in tears at this point. It sucks. I don’t know what to do. It’s been so long since it’s been this bad. I need to cry. I was doing so good before, and now I’m broken AGAINWHY?! What did I fucking do to deserve all of this? Why can’t life just go smoothly? I haven’t stopped crying, bawling my soul out. It’s taken me over 5 minutes to write this paragraph.

After crying so hard, I feel oddly okay. After processing in my journal, things are much better. I think I just needed to do both. More of both lay ahead of me, however. Sometimes, you can’t stand strong or stand tall. Time to meditate.